a letter to a lover

"i love you". those words flew so casually yet so passionately from my fingers. a digital kiss, intimacy  mediated by pixels that approximate just enough of the reality of my affection  to be seen  and understood. always in excess, never with access, i hope you sleep well.

having a girlfriend is strange. but i get what people say  now. it used to scare me that feelings weren't permanent, that things didnt last. but thats why i love love, and thats why i love loving you. because texting you, being with you, feeling eachother melt into eachother as we desperately grasp for one more moment of intimacy, grasping at hands that were forged to be held. every moment feels more than what it is, it feels important, it feels worthwhile. a feeling that my mere existence is enough. a feeling that everything i am feeling is more than a feeling, but something indicative of something so much greater. 

love poems are arbitrary, but so are all words, so is everything except for this. if the langauge i use to articulate beauty is compromised by the fact that it must be heard and known, than so be it. let my words betray me, let them fall short and stumble. they are no longer all i have. now i have you.